I've heard for years and years that the first 5 years of marriage is the hardest... Well, I think we're in the drawing for the megamega lotto and retirement by age 40 considering we're a year and a half in and holy ray of sunshine, what did I sign up for!?!?
Now, I'm no seasoned vet and I've definitely passed those spring chicken years, but I thought this new age of 30 and new to this marriage thing meant 'in my prime for years of the honeymoon stage.' Haha! God seriously has a sense of humor. (Hey God, I am serious about that early retirement with some serious honeymooning around the new prime age of 40. Just saying).
But really, this give and take thing, quick to say sorry and easy to forgive, the continuation of dating each other, and the selflessness is freaking tough! Not to mention, working together to become the strongest fortitude when life throws you in a trench of cow dung, infested with roaches and then continues to shovel more dung on top of you, right as you're able to see a light and take that glorious fresh breath of air. That last part has been the hardest of them all..
That smile and that heart, of the man I chose to say 'I Do' with, are reminders and the biggest encouragers, that we will get through these hard times and come out on top. Together.
This 'new life' we've been introduced to, of having to travel to a different state to see my man's little man, of becoming vacation/holiday parents, of staying as involved as humanly possible and of carrying on a relationship over the phone, has been interesting to say the least. It's been a challenge in a variety of areas, one of them being a serious test so early into our marriage. But challenge or not, I think we have a strong foundation and have created a fortitude so unwavering that all the little guy knows, is that he is loved IMMENSELY by many. That we have continued to encourage him, teach him, raise him, love him some more and make him feel comfortable, safe and normal in the most undesired of situations. I often scroll through my photos to mentally escape reality and I just smile and my heart melts at their smiles.
Feeling especially "testy" today, I decided to revisit those vows I wrote and proclaimed in front of our family and friends. I admit, I don't exactly remember what promises I decided to commit to after a year and a half. But to my surprise, I put together some pretty great words!
"Taylor-
There is no one I'd rather be standing in front of today than you. You are my best friend, the love of my life and the perfect match to my imperfect self.
I promise to always be there for you, to be by your side when things come crashing down. I will always be faithful and respect you. I vow to always be your encourager and challenger. I promise to love you and Lucas unconditionally and be the best wife and co-parent I can possibly be.
I love you with everything in me and am excited for the foundation we've built to continue to grow. I want us to be the best outline and example for Lucas that we can be and the best way I know how to begin that process is to just fall in love with you more & more each day."
After reading my vows, I felt like someone hit me upside the head. It was like I got a full lungful of fresh air and my head was above that dung mound. I haven't the slightest idea of what the years ahead have in store for us, but we make a great team and I continue to fall more in love with my husband and son. And at the end of the day, there is no one I'd rather be with than my husband.
For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in poop and in pleasure, right?
Now, I'm no seasoned vet and I've definitely passed those spring chicken years, but I thought this new age of 30 and new to this marriage thing meant 'in my prime for years of the honeymoon stage.' Haha! God seriously has a sense of humor. (Hey God, I am serious about that early retirement with some serious honeymooning around the new prime age of 40. Just saying).
But really, this give and take thing, quick to say sorry and easy to forgive, the continuation of dating each other, and the selflessness is freaking tough! Not to mention, working together to become the strongest fortitude when life throws you in a trench of cow dung, infested with roaches and then continues to shovel more dung on top of you, right as you're able to see a light and take that glorious fresh breath of air. That last part has been the hardest of them all..
That smile and that heart, of the man I chose to say 'I Do' with, are reminders and the biggest encouragers, that we will get through these hard times and come out on top. Together.
This 'new life' we've been introduced to, of having to travel to a different state to see my man's little man, of becoming vacation/holiday parents, of staying as involved as humanly possible and of carrying on a relationship over the phone, has been interesting to say the least. It's been a challenge in a variety of areas, one of them being a serious test so early into our marriage. But challenge or not, I think we have a strong foundation and have created a fortitude so unwavering that all the little guy knows, is that he is loved IMMENSELY by many. That we have continued to encourage him, teach him, raise him, love him some more and make him feel comfortable, safe and normal in the most undesired of situations. I often scroll through my photos to mentally escape reality and I just smile and my heart melts at their smiles.
Feeling especially "testy" today, I decided to revisit those vows I wrote and proclaimed in front of our family and friends. I admit, I don't exactly remember what promises I decided to commit to after a year and a half. But to my surprise, I put together some pretty great words!
"Taylor-
There is no one I'd rather be standing in front of today than you. You are my best friend, the love of my life and the perfect match to my imperfect self.
I promise to always be there for you, to be by your side when things come crashing down. I will always be faithful and respect you. I vow to always be your encourager and challenger. I promise to love you and Lucas unconditionally and be the best wife and co-parent I can possibly be.
I love you with everything in me and am excited for the foundation we've built to continue to grow. I want us to be the best outline and example for Lucas that we can be and the best way I know how to begin that process is to just fall in love with you more & more each day."
After reading my vows, I felt like someone hit me upside the head. It was like I got a full lungful of fresh air and my head was above that dung mound. I haven't the slightest idea of what the years ahead have in store for us, but we make a great team and I continue to fall more in love with my husband and son. And at the end of the day, there is no one I'd rather be with than my husband.
For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in poop and in pleasure, right?